The Cousland's Struggle
by elmatador
Summary: Aedan has buried his emotions and questions his purpose. All of his comrades know the situation, but one takes the initiative and she is eager to show her concern for the Warden.  Mature for suggestive themes. Could possibly be teen.


The Cousland's Struggle

Aedan sat on one of the large rocks surrounding the fire. He had waited for all of his comrades to turn in for the night, except for Sten, who would keep watch. Alistair and Zevran were the last to leave, as they needed to carry the passed out Oghren to his tent. He clenched his fists.

Aedan slowly stood from his somewhat comfortable spot. He had been thinking for sometime now, trying to organize his thoughts. More questions than answers.

"Sten, I'll be back." Aedan nearly expected him to question his motives, but instead he just nodded.

The warrior felt a small smirk build on his face. It quickly went away as he remembered his previous thoughts. He made his way out of the camp heading towards the large clearing he had seen. The moonlight lit his path.

Sten truly wasn't as simple as some might believe. He could sense some distress in the young noble. Normally he wouldn't be considering any of this, but being with humans for so long had affected changed his view. Unfortunately for them, he would never admit it would stay that way.

He continued to stare out as far as he could see, ears open. The sound of leaves cracking forced him to turn his head back to the camp. It was the other Warden. The odd king, to be exact. Sten was surprised by this one. He had feared becoming a leader up until he felt the need to take control from the slipping Aedan.

"Sten, has the boy ventured off again?" His face was filled with concern.

"He wandered into the clearing after you took the dwarf. He was fully armed, as usual."

Alistair sighed. "As long as he doesn't come back covered in blood and soon, we can all have some late night cheese."

This time Sten sighed. "I understand that in the human world, cookies are much more comforting than this cheese you speak of."

"Surely he doesn't think I am clueless to his nightly ventures at night, can he?"

"Oh nothing goes by you, **your majesty**." It was the crude and often sarcastic witch; Morrigan. Alistair frowned and she smiled. She was wearing a cloak, which surprised him. _Can a cold woman be stricken the cold? _He chuckled within himself at the thought. _And what was this "your majesty"? Her mocking of his status would never end._

"What are you doing here? Not enough time in the day to peck at me?"

"There is never enough time, **your majesty**. Tis not the point, however; I wonder about Aedan", she spoke in somber tone. Before Alistair could call her on her concerned feelings, she cut him off, "I've seen him leaving his tent or just wait by the fire. I fear he has come to realize what he has lost. Love truly is a poison." She sat across from Alistair, across the fire, sulking with her face in her palms.

She was beautiful, but her demeanor was unsettling for him. She was also an apostate and not a noble were two reasons to also avoid any relations. He was pleased to see she had some emotions. They had all been through so much together and she had shown no consideration for anyone really. Then again, it was Aedan who welcomed her to the group and let her speak her mind even though it was a cruel opinion.

_Did she like him?_ He looked at the witch, but she had disappeared.

"Um, Sten?" he asked the qunari hoping for an answer.

"She took a more hairy form and took to the clearing." Sten continued to stare out there. "How did we end up with so many strange characters?"

Alistair opened the food back eager to find his favorite snack. In the process, he found a small jar with the letters, "S T E N" engraved on the side. He smiled and threw container up near Sten. Without looking, Sten caught the jar and carried on with his watch.

Alistair finally found his prize near the bottom of the pack. It was neatly wrapped in cloth he found in a shop in Denerim. He reached into the pack, pulling out some bread and set it, with the cheese, next to him. "Now to wait for our young friend.

Aedan stopped at the top of the hill in the clearing. The moon was large and shone off of his dragon bone armor. It was he, Alistair, Morrigan and Leliana who took down the high dragon that put this powerful armor on his back. It was a foolhardy move to alert the beast. Then to battle it was even worse. Had he not managed to get on its head for the killing blow, his comrades would have been burned to a crisp.

"And father wanted me to survive… for what? To lead? I cannot lead anyone" Aedan knelt down on one knee and pulled out his family's blade from the sheath on his back. "I nearly killed my entire group. If we had fallen, there would be no one in Ferelden to end this Blight! Even Alistair, a man who placed a day old Grey Warden in charge and avoid the throne, is now doing a better job than I!"

Aedan felt a lump in his throat. Then, even surprising himself, a tear rolled down his face. "I have no one to guide me. Mother, Father are gone… Fergus is still missing… What do I do?" He stood abruptly and yelled, "What do I do?" With that, he violently thrust the family sword into the ground. Another yell escaped him. Nothing stirred for the moment, just the sound of him breathing heavily.

He knelt down again and rested his head on the hilt of blade. "I'm a damn fool."

"Quite an entertaining fool, if I may." A rather soothing voice it was. It was Morrigan.

"Morrigan what- how long have you been here?" He liked Morrigan, regardless of her attitude on life. He felt it was just a result of being raised by shrew like Flemeth. She was as smart as she was beautiful.

"I watched from afar. Are you a vulture, I wonder? Picking at bones of the past, hopelessly searching for answers?" She continued to walk forward to him. "Or merely an intruder-" Aedan held up his hand and smiled. Her attempt to cheer him up using similar dialogue to when they first met had worked. But he could not let go of his anger.

"Morrigan, please. I'm thankful for your concern but I'd rather not hear it right now."

"I- I'm not concerned. I'm trying to get you back into shape so I won't follow that witless Alistair's orders." Aedan knew her fairly well now. She couldn't fool him anymore.

"Right. My apologies. Now please leave me be."

Morrigan got a stern look on her face and stared him down. "No."

"Go, Morrigan." His face tightened.

Alistair closed his eyes. The sound of his friend yelling disturbed him. Thankfully, his other comrades had joined him and Sten. All except for Morrigan that is. She had been gone for a while now.

"I don't understand why he did not choose to ask us for help. He helped me face my past", spoke the Orlesian bard, Leliana. She was right. He had helped each of them in some way. Alistair asked for his assistance in meeting his half-sister, and then gave him a new outlook on life. It was a speech that almost compelled him to take the throne now.

"If it was for the lad, I wouldn't be alive and be with all of you, my friends." It was Zevran, the assassin elf.

"That was sweet, Zevran. I almost expected-"

"Ah Leliana. I'm very grateful to him for letting be able to follow of you women everyday" he smiled.

"Um, never mind Zev." Leliana scrunched up a bit to not give Zevran the luxury of looking at her. Ogrhen laughed that as he spilled some of ale.

Wynne, the elder mage sat next to Alistair. "Zevran, the poor girl alone."

"As you wish, my darling. The epitome of a perfect, mature woman."

She sighed. "The young Warden has done something to assist each of us in some way. A sword, life, closure, and family."

"Aye. He is selfless bastard. And I should know since it takes one to one." Alistair chuckled.

"Ha! Selfless? Pike Twirler, you're a bastard, but you're sure as hell not selfless like the boy" scoffed the dwarf.

"…Drunk." Alistair muttered under his breath a few curses at the dwarf. That garnered a few laughs from the group except Sten. Just an audible crunch of a cookie came from his direction. A few more laughs followed.

"I said no. You are obviously no leader, little Aedan. I think the others might fancy even myself as leader over you." She smirked.

Aedan was steaming now. He paced back and forth trying to avoid bursting out in anger. "You don't understand, Morrigan. What I've lost- it's too much now. I've buried it deep within and I don't know what to do with it." Another lump filled in his throat but he tried to control it. He would not tear up in front of the witch.

"Oh my. My apologies, milord. My heart aches for you. Do you require a shoulder to cry on?" Her sarcastic remarks made the Warden reach for his secondary blade at his side. "You wish to strike me down. I hope you are better with a sword than your parents. They sound like the type that would trip and fall upon a blade than die honorably." Morrigan continued to smile at him. She had pushed him to the limit. Aedan couldn't take it anymore; he unsheathed his blade and swung at Morrigan.

His anger did not allow him to think or fight like he should. Morrigan knew this and sidestepped his attack. She took out her staff and pestered him powerless little wisps of energy.

"The great Aedan Cousland fails to avenge his parents. How ashamed they must be that he cannot strike down a witch. Tsk, tsk little warrior." Aedan continued to swing, throwing everything he could behind it. He began to breath heavily. _The bitch won't stay still. She must fall. I must have control. I must be able to lead. I must make them proud!_

He yelled and swung will his might at her neck. Morrigan smiled and ducked under the blade. She stuck her staff at Aedan's midsection and told him, "Be cool, Aedan".

Cold air and ice erupted from the staff freezing the Warden before he could move again.

A smile crept across her face as she rose to her feet and faced him. Only his head remained unfrozen. Morrigan placed her hand on his cheek. "You, dear ser, are a powerful warrior and leader. I- I did not mean what I said. I only wished to let you release this anger within your soul." Aedan truly began to cool, literally and figuratively. Her face was now soft and innocent in her approach. "Aedan, you are better than all of us. You helped each of us face our problems without asking for anything in return. You battled Flemeth for me."

A warming smile formed on her face. Aedan now felt like a fool. He nearly killed Morrigan, while she had rejuvenated him. He is now greatly in her debt. "Morrigan, I am so sorry." If he had a free hand, he would have put his hand to her face as well.

Suddenly, he began to feel warm. The ice slowly turned to water around him as he gained control of his body again. There they stood facing each other. Aedan dropped his blade and removed his armored glove from his hand. Once it was free, he touched the witch's warm skin. "I still don't understand all the touching," she said reminding Aedan of their previous conversations, "but I won't mind you hands upon me." She smiled.

"I-" Aedan tried to speak but she placed two fingers on his lip.

"You look cold, milord. Perhaps you can warm up in my tent?" Aedan chuckled at her less than innocent look.

"I should inspect this tent to make sure it is warm enough. Just in case."

"Oh but what will we do while we inspect in a such a small place all alone?" Her look became a little more devious and Aedan couldn't believe what he had just gotten himself into. He was inviting her advances. He also couldn't stop talking either.

"I'm sure you will think of something…" Aedan blushed at his own words. _Thank the Maker it's dark or I would look like a tomato._

"Come then, my warrior. Let us take in the night together." She turned towards camp and walked. Aedan hypnotically followed her. She lightly giggled as she looked over shoulder at him. _My love_ she thought.

Alistair and the others continued to wait eagerly for their companion to return. They had not yet heard from Morrigan either. However, their experiences with her allowed them to not care.

"Do you think we should go look for him now? Those last few yells and grunts were a little much for my liking" said Leliana fearing the worst for Aedan.

"Nah. The boy probably just went a little hard down under or met magical lass out there. Hah!" Oghren's jokes were dirty but often provided entertainment among the men.

Zevran tossed a coin to Sten.

"What the bloody hell was that, elf?" Ogrhen sat up and eyed the two fellows.

"It was a bet, my short friend. A bet that I could have won if you drank a little more ale and a little less talking."

"Why you…"

Alistair shut out the noise and began to work on his cheese. He wouldn't wait any longer to dig into it. Wynne looked at him.

"Cheese?" He stuck it inches away from her face.

"No, Alistair. I just wanted to say I am proud of you for giving the boy a chance to solve this and you taking over."

"No problem, my dear Wynne. I-" He was interrupted by leaves crunching near the entrance to the clearing. It wasn't whom he expected. It was Morrigan.

"Morrigan! What-" Then Aedan followed after her. He saw her face his friend and say something he couldn't make out. They both walked towards Morrigan's tent on the far side of the camp.

"Um, Aedan. We need to talk! I brought some cheese to eat while we do." Alistair looked on oblivious to what was happening.

"That's okay, Alistair", Aedan called to him. "I am a little busy right now. I will see you all at dawn."

Alistair raised his eyebrow and watched as his friend entered the tent after Morrigan. "Aedan! What are you doing?'

"Hah! The boy did find a magical lass!" Oghren toasted to the air and drank. Meanwhile, Zevran, Leliana, and Wynne tossed coins to Sten.

"Now what was that for?" yelled Ogrhen.

"That was for the Morrigan and Aedan, silly" giggled Leliana. "I think it's romantic."

Ogrhen grumbled to himself. He could have made that bet easily and made a killing. _Bloody qunari._

"I do not approve of this joining. However, I hope he can do something about her."

"Oh he will do something to her, dear Wynne. I can do the same for you as well if you would allow me?" Zevran pleaded to her with a coy look on his face.

"Zevran! I- I don't know why I bother anymore. Goodnight all of you." Wynne disappeared into her tent.

All the while, Alistair couldn't believe what he just saw. _I can't believe it!_

He sighed and looked back to the remainder of the group. " Oh well, his funeral. Cheese and bread anyone?"

The Cousland blade remained in the clearing at the highest point. Aedan's struggles would stay there for now. He vowed that one day he would return for the family sword to battle darkspawn in the Deep Roads or maybe a whole other adventure with his love.


End file.
